When I moved down to St. George just over a year ago I thought I had life just about figured out. I knew exactly how I "expected" the next two years of my life to go. For some reason I thought I knew a lot more then God did. I would be lying if I said this past year plus has been easy, or the "best time of my life". It hasn't! In fact there have been two many times to count that I have wanted to throw in the towel and give up. I spent many nights feelings alone and inadequate, the darkest times in my life have been in my short time in St. George. There have been many times that I've thought, "Why would God let this happen?" "Or if the church is REALLY true I wouldn't feel this way!" Well it's all been worth it. I've learned so much about myself, who I am, what I want, where I'm going, and so on. I really feel like God makes weak (me) things strong. I've learned so many life lessons on everything from forgiveness, repentance, and gaining my OWN testimony. I still have another 6 months in St. George, and I doubt I will ever look back on my time here and think, "Wow, that is how life as a college student should be!" I will always look back on my time here as the biggest learning experience in my life! I'm sure there are still many hard times to come, but there hasn't been a single trial that I haven't been grateful for! I guess the trick in life is enduring our trials, and later enjoying what we learn through them. My biggest problem is that I thought I could endure these trials by myself, I didn't need help, especially from God! Now I look at anything and think, "I know I can't do this by myself!" The things I've learned down here a to many to count, but I'm grateful for every single one of them. I'm grateful life changes, and that I learn through my trails and mistakes. I'm grateful for the wonderful people that have come and gone in my St. George life. I'm so thankful for the wonderful people who got me through my darkest times! Every prayer I've ever prayed has been answered in one way or another. (Most of them not in the way I saw best fit)
~forgive the soap box! I just felt extremely compelled to share these things! It might sound totally cheesy, so you can take it or leave it!
7 comments:
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TESTIMONY. IT IS VERY INSPIRING. I JUST GIVING YOU A HARD TIME. I THINK IT IS REALLY INSTERESTING TO LOOK AT OUR LIVES AND SEE THE TRIALS THAT WE HAVE GONE THROUGH AND THINKING WE WOULD NEVER GET THROUGH THEM. WE DO!! I THINK ABOUT CROSSING THE STREET WITH MY BOYS AND I URGE JOSH TO TAKE MY HAND. HE DOESN'T AND FALLS IN THE ROAD. THE LORD ALWAYS HAS HIS HAND OUT WAITING FOR US TO TAKE IT. WHY DOES OUR PRIDE GET IN THE WAY? I AM SORRY THAT THINGS HAVE BEEN HARD, BUT "GRIT YOUR TEETH AND BARE IT"
LOVE YOU
I was worried this post would sound negative or that I was unhappy. I'm not at all, I'm actually very happy. I was just realizing a few things today! This was not one of my pitty party posts!
It's great to read your inner thoughts. Papa experienced the same thing he says when he first went to Logan to school. Remember the best is yet to come! I liked what you said about while we're here we should dance!
It didn't sound like you are down, although I know we all have those thoughts and feelings. I am glad that you are happy and enjoying life.
Isn't Maga the best? I just love her with all my heart. She makes everything better - Maga and shopping.
I love you, Brooke. You are strong and brave and beautiful. Too bad we have to have challenges in order to grow - I just want the growth part. Challenges are over-rated. You're handling things so well.
I can't wait to see you again. Have fun in Cali. Think of me often while I'm home with the Babe and the Boy.
Luv ya Brooke. Challenges are fun aren't they? I don't think a day goes by that we aren't challenged one way or another. At least that is how my life is. I have 5 of the cutest challenges everyday, but would never send them back! Have fun on your trip!
Brook, thanks for sharing your introspective thoughts. I am so glad you are able to realize that there are things to learn in ALL we experience. You learned that alot earlier that I did (I'm not sure I HAVE learned it yet!!) Your such a great woman. I hope the next 6 months are how college life should be (to quote from your blog).
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